So, yesterday was not a very good day for me; I was all wrapped up in myself and self-pity was running riot. I was feeling as though I had let everyone down and that my dreams were never going to come true; that I was nothing but a failure and I might as well give up. Yes I went there and for most of the day at that. It seemed like the harder I tried, the worse things got. Overwhelming feelings took over like a sudden disaster and seemed to be suffocating me.
I knew that if I allowed these feelings to continue that I was headed for some dangerous territory; so I did what I know to do and I went to my Sponser’s house and shared my feelings and thoughts, in a vulnerable way. There was nothing positive coming out of my mouth, especially about myself. She pointed out to me that all I was doing was beating myself up and the only place that was going to get me was into a deep and dark depression. We talked for a long time and it really felt better getting out what was honestly going on with me , both in my head and in my heart.
Sometimes we just have bad days; We feel “bluh”and just want to escape from it all; especially when everything seems to be falling apart around us. If we don’t quickly get into the solution, we will lead ourselves’ to much darker places; depression, despair, isolation, fear, loneliness & even destruction.
When you have those days, don’t beat yourself up; we all go through such times. Reach out to someone, share what’s going on and be open-minded and willing enough to take some suggestions; and when things seem to be falling apart, don’t allow it to cause you to give up; Just because things aren’t working out on your time-table , doesn’t mean they never will.
((((hugs & love))))
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